Apocalypse Wednesday

This might be your last weekend alive.

Sorry to break this to you, but the world might end on Wednesday. A lovely bunch of scientists in Switzerland have decided that it might be fun to build the world's largest partical collider (called the Large Hadron Collider) that not only collides particals, but also carries the added bonus of maybe creating a doorway to another dimension (no doubt making a lot of Half-Life fans excited) or a miniature black hole. So, either we'll all be sucked towards Switzerland or we'll be knee-deep in headcrabs. Either way, things might not go well.

A (crap) artist's impression of the creation of a dimensional rift

In the event of a black hole being created, we might not actually realise that we're doomed, because we'll be sucked towards it so quickly. However, you can look forward to your body being crushed by the emmense amount of gravity exerted on it, and then being thrown through a good few walls and other things. In that way, we won't actually as a race find out whether there actually is another side to a black hole, because we'll be dead.

If you wiki the Large Hadron Collider project, you'll actually find that there's a lot of talk about what the thing does, what risks it might have and what the scientists say may not happen, but there isn't actually anything about why they're doing it. I presume it's just because, much like a lot of science. So if there is a horrible accident and a black hole is created, we'll be safe in the knowledge that we were killed by our own stupidity, like I'm sure most of us always knew we always would.

I'm not totally convinced that we will die, I'm just saying it could happen, just like it's entirely likely that you'll be hit by a car tomorrow (well, ok, maybe not on a Sunday). I'm not saying we should panic, or lie on the floor and put paper bags on our heads, because theoretically we could do that all day. Death is certain, but not always by black hole.

Anyway, if we do end up meeting our end on Wednesday, I hope I say something good before I'm crushed. I probably won't, I'll say something crap, like "Can I borrow a pencil?".
I hope at least I was right about there being no god. I think in a situation like that, a religious lecture is the last thing I need.